I’ll admit, I was a bit hesitant to post my final assignment. I don’t mean “final” as in “final exam”. I mean final as in “final paper”. I sadly was asked after turning in this essay “to never return to class and to consider leaving life altogether”. I’m not even sure of the content that was on the final exam, as I wasn’t allowed to take it. I’ve been sort of hiding out in my tiny Brooklyn apartment wondering what went wrong. I was so excited to finally finish school that maybe I got caught up in why I quit in the first place; It isn’t easy like loving my cat is, and having to have a full-time job so that I can buy her the highest quality kibble on the market doesn’t allow me the time that one needs to study. Sigh. With all of that being said, I really really tried when it came to writing these papers. Sure, I didn’t always quite understand the assignments, although in hindsight I may have made it more complicated than it really needed to be. I guess I just wanted to do a good job, the best even! I’d heard that Professor Trowbridge’s class was a difficult one, but I hadn’t heard that he was so rude. If you’re reading this, teach, I think maybe you need to take a long look in the mirror and learn what it means to “be nice”. Either way, I’ll be sending him a thank you card and I might even use this vintage stationary that I picked up in Vermont during Christmas break. Knowing him, he’ll probably just write a big fat “F” on it and mark it return to sender. If I can get off of academic probation for parking my car in the faculty lot one too many times, (I’m color blind, people!!! ARG!) then I’ll be taking the class again next semester with a DIFFERENT professor. One who’s nice, hopefully. So, here it is. My Magnum Opus.
Just an update, Cookie was very upset yesterday because she had to run into town with my mom so that they could get manicures together. Not “together” technically-but Mom likes to drop Cookie off at Dog Gone Pretty while she heads over to Nails by Nikki to get a manicure at the same time. That’s the sort of thing that people do when THEY ARE NICE and I hope that the faculty at my beloved community college in Brooklyn can learn from it. So I bid you all a HAPPY SUMMER! I’m going to the park to stare at children and hope that when motherhood calls my aging and dying body, it doesn’t FAIL me the way that everyone else has.
Sorry again for another hiatus, gang. I guess since my last assignment I’ve been a little depressed to tell you the truth. I really thought I had it this time. I spent hours in the library doing research. I even re-read my extra booklet that explains proper MLA format and I went so far as to re-watch the CD-rom titled Using the Internet and CD Roms:A Guide for Students Over Thirty that came with my textbook. I’m sort of at a loss here so if anyone has any advice that they could give me, I welcome it with open arms and an open heart. I was really hoping that I’d finish my degree this year so that I could finally use that 10X13 frame that I bought over at the Hobby Lobby. It’s just sitting there, empty, collecting dust. SIgh. Maybe next semester.
In other news, Cookie is doing just fine. She even got a manicure recently. Which, is more than I can say for myself! Ack!
*December 1st, 2011*
Hey gang! Sorry for the brief hiatus. Honestly, I’ve been feeling a little embarrassed by my progress towards the end of the semester. I was so excited and feeling really good about my work, but then I received yet another failing grade. Oooooof. So much for being an optimist. I’m a few assigments behind posting-wise, and I don’t want to spill the beans so to speak-but something tells me I won’t be getting my degree at the end of the semester like I thought I would. I’ve been told by my guidance counselor that I might even have to retake the course. Sigh. What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger. Oooooooooooooooof. 
For this assignment, I asked a good friend of mine whom I met in the courtyard of my school for some guidance. He agreed, but I had to pay him by going on a date with his cousin: a nice, but aggressive young man by the name of Hot Dante$! (I think the “dollar sign” is silent, though I’m not quite sure.) I have two weeks to redeem this “date”, otherwise Hot Dante$ says he’s gonna “take action”. He smashed his right fist into his left hand whilst telling me this, so I know he means business. It’s just so hard to make time for a date when I’ve got so much homework to do! I looked up Hot Dante$ on Facebook, and I’m pretty sure that I’m not even his type. Regardless, I don’t think my boyfriend would appreciate me going out with this guy. My friend didn’t seem to care. He said in my current academic state that I “have no other choice”. Let’s see how well I did this time around…
Hot Dante$ just sent me a text message telling me that I better be ready to roll at 8 PM EST tonight. Sigh. Maybe I should hire a tutor. Back to the ol’ writing board.
I’ll admit, I got a little too excited about this assignment. i think that party planning is in my blood! (Just ask my Aunt Patty. Last year she and I planned an incredible party for my uncle and his pals, a little something to the tune of a Vegas-themed poker night!) This is turning out to be a tough semester. I’m also so worried about my mom’s dog, Cookie, that I’m losing a little sleep here and there. Sigh. Back to the ol’ writing board…
For this assignment, I decided to hunker down and do some real research. I headed down to my local library and checked out a copy of Pixar’s Toy Story. (If you haven’t seen it, what are ya livin’ under a rock!?) I love it when assignments give me a chance to catch up on my pop culture! It also feels good to be able to confidently turn in an assignment. I feel really good about this one. Cross your fingers!
Sigh. Back to the ol’ writing board. Gah!!!
For our first assignment, Professor Trowbridge assigned everyone the topic of The Civil War. My mother had sent me a slew of text messages during class about her dog, Cookie, and how her veterinary appointment wasn’t going very well. I completely misunderstood Professor Trowbridge’s assignment. Sigh. I need to pay attention! It’s hard to when I’ve got so much going on outside of class! Cookie ended up being okay, though. She sure gave my mom a scare. 
*Professor Trowbridge informed me that he was so embarrassed by my paper that he didn’t want anyone who might find it to know that I was in his class, which is why he signed it “Mrs. Richardson”. I’ve got to try harder if I’m going to finish school this semester! Oh well! Here’s a picture of Cookie:
