I’ll admit, I was a bit hesitant to post my final assignment. I don’t mean “final” as in “final exam”. I mean final as in “final paper”. I sadly was asked after turning in this essay “to never return to class and to consider leaving life altogether”. I’m not even sure of the content that was on the final exam, as I wasn’t allowed to take it. I’ve been sort of hiding out in my tiny Brooklyn apartment wondering what went wrong. I was so excited to finally finish school that maybe I got caught up in why I quit in the first place; It isn’t easy like loving my cat is, and having to have a full-time job so that I can buy her the highest quality kibble on the market doesn’t allow me the time that one needs to study. Sigh. With all of that being said, I really really tried when it came to writing these papers. Sure, I didn’t always quite understand the assignments, although in hindsight I may have made it more complicated than it really needed to be. I guess I just wanted to do a good job, the best even! I’d heard that Professor Trowbridge’s class was a difficult one, but I hadn’t heard that he was so rude. If you’re reading this, teach, I think maybe you need to take a long look in the mirror and learn what it means to “be nice”. Either way, I’ll be sending him a thank you card and I might even use this vintage stationary that I picked up in Vermont during Christmas break. Knowing him, he’ll probably just write a big fat “F” on it and mark it return to sender. If I can get off of academic probation for parking my car in the faculty lot one too many times, (I’m color blind, people!!! ARG!) then I’ll be taking the class again next semester with a DIFFERENT professor. One who’s nice, hopefully. So, here it is. My Magnum Opus.
Just an update, Cookie was very upset yesterday because she had to run into town with my mom so that they could get manicures together. Not “together” technically-but Mom likes to drop Cookie off at Dog Gone Pretty while she heads over to Nails by Nikki to get a manicure at the same time. That’s the sort of thing that people do when THEY ARE NICE and I hope that the faculty at my beloved community college in Brooklyn can learn from it. So I bid you all a HAPPY SUMMER! I’m going to the park to stare at children and hope that when motherhood calls my aging and dying body, it doesn’t FAIL me the way that everyone else has.